Container Wars: Ms. America Coughs Furballs

Container Wars: Season 1, Episode 10: “Fur Play.”

Three aspiring beauty queens arrived at the shipyard. Uzi as Ms. America. Eyal as Ms. International. Shlomi as Ms. California. Yes, Israelis in d-r-a-g, if you can call it that. The Israeli trio donned sashes and tiaras. Funny, for some reason they looked far more attractive with tiaras. Just saying…

1^st Container: Port of Origin – British Columbia, Canada
Huge 40 foot container. Wood and more wood. Like a lumber yard threw up in the container. Everyone who bid thought there would be a “surprise” beyond the lumber. Wrong! No surprise. Just wood and more wood.

This was all Jason. He had to unload the lumber to see what was beyond the lumber.

More WOOD!

Jason did find architectural plans to build a complete house. He was happy because he didn’t lose money, this time ’round.

Jason: Jackpot!

Cost: $30,000
Profit: $4,000

2^nd Container: Port of Origin – Boston Harbor, Massachusetts
Antiques, chandelier, Colonial furniture, and boxes labeled, “fragile.” You know Mo loves furniture, however Ty was not “feeling it.”

Mo would buy the container with or without him. Not cool!

Ty did smile once he saw the box of vintage sports memorabilia. Especially when he found a football signed by Hall of Fame, retired NFL Quarterback, Joe Namath.

Mo loved the hand-made wood door and antique armoire. Both men happy and in the money.

Mo: I am the furniture king!

Cost: $31,500
Profit: $4,500

3^rd Container: Port of Origin – San Francisco, California
Full-sized animatronics stuffed animals. Photo booth (type you see at arcades or boardwalks) and lockers with locks. Potential for a big payout, IF, and that’s a big “if” there’s something of valued locked away.

Who likes to gamble on big payoffs? You guessed it, Matt. Deana whispered a warning to Matt that the Israelis would try to screw him. Did Matt listen? No.

Photo booth was fake. No photo screen or camera to take photos. The sign, “Foto” should have been a dead give-a-way. Mat used a crow bar to pry open the lockers. Did he find money? That would be a big – NO! He found a bag of tokens. You know you’re laughing out loud.

Matt: Worthless!

Cost: $24,000
LOSS: -$11,125

4^th Container: Port of Origin – Novorossiysk, Russia
Fur coats and lots of them. Huge safe in the back along with a half-size refrigerator. Think about this, the container sat for nine months. That refrigerator therefore unplugged for nine months. Did Deana think it through before she bought? No, she pulled a Caesar.

She saw it. She wanted it. She bought it.

Furs were real. The patterns do not repeat and the fur flows. But who wears politically incorrect furs in the 21^st century? I guess a lot of rich people do. Deana counted fifteen fur coats, including a full-length mink coat; fur wraps in a box, and then there was that refrigerator.

Stinky, stained fur coats wrapped in plastic. Crate in back the same. That’s a whole lot of fur balls. Her saving grace would be the safe. Actually, that wasn’t a safe either, but a type of refrigerator. Inside, wrapped skins such as alligator (taking a guess here). Not enough to put her in the black.

Deana: I’m not here to break even. I’m here to make a profit!

Cost: $30,000
Profit: $0

Do you think Uzi has a chance at the title, “Ms America?” We are a free country, but maybe not that forward thinking; or when it comes to Uzi, that backward thinking.

What did you think of this crazy “furball” episode?

Please leave your insightful opinions in the comment box below.