Storage Wars: Season 1, Episode 15: “Chairman of the Hoard.”
Barry believed that six out of the seven storage units up for auction belonged to the same tenant. Darrell believed the lockers belonged to antique dealer. Dave believed the city was full of old money (rich folk). Jarrod believed this could be their biggest auction ever. What did Brandi believe?
Brandi: I think it’s a hoarder.
Guess who was right.
1st Storage Unit
Holy (bleep)! Hoarder locker! Items wrapped in grocery store white plastic bags or sacks. Did not look like an antique dealer at all. Dave Jr. bid this round as Hester remained quiet. Darrell imitated Dave’s “Yuup” bid until Barry decided he wanted this hoarder’s heap and won at $850.
How do you dig through a hoarder’s storage unit? Barry burrowed his way down the middle. Junk. Junk. More junk.
Barry: This is a good place to break a hip. At my age, it could happen.
He said as he precariously stood on top of two water coolers and fourteen 
magazines. Oh, Barry, Barry, Barry… please have good health insurance. Did he find anything of value? Uh, that would be a BIG NO!
Barry did find the 1st issue of Hot Rod Magazine valued at $10.
Wah. Wah. Wah.
2nd Storage Unit – Hoarder locker
3rd Storage Unit – Hoarder locker
4th Storage Unit – Hoarder locker – Brandi smelled a dead cat (ew).
5th Storage Unit – Hoarder locker
6th Storage Unit
Holy (bleep-bleep)! Hoarder locker Maximus! Brandi stated this one didn’t quite stink as bad as the others (small consolation). If they wanted a locker they needed to win this one. Did she win?
Dan sold it to Dave for $1,100. Wait a minute. Dave didn’t bid.
OOPS!
Hey, it happens. Dan confused. Laura stated to restart the auction and reset the last bid at $1,000. So did Brandi win?
Brandi: Yuup!
At the hefty price of $1,050. Jarrod brought two assistants. They couldn’t believe the mess inside. Jarrod undaunted, believed there was something of value in the back. Needed to created a path through the pile of crap to get back there.
Underneath a moving blanket was an antique furniture piece. Jarrod 
normally would not ask Dave for advice, but he had to know if the hutch was the real deal.
Jarrod: I got a question for you Dave. Feel like being sincere for a minute.
Oh, how my mind races to find that perfect pun…
Dave offered to give an appraisal, but Jarrod shook his head “no.” Dave’s curiosity got the better of him.
Dave: One time I’ll make an exception.
Jarrod: I think your wife made an exception one time too, huh? That’s how you got one kid.
BURN!
Back to the hutch… Dave said it was a reproduction of a French Renaissance piece. Made in Spain around 1950s. Estimated value at $1,500.
Dave said the rest of Jarrod’s stuff was sh–. Hold on, something caught Dave’s eye. It was a make-up mirror. Dave stated that could be worth more than the hutch. Actually, it was appraised for the same amount at $1,500 at an antique shop.
Jarrod: We beat Dave. We filled our shelves. We scored three G’s in antiques.
7th Storage Unit
Not a hoarder’s unit, phew! Wicker bedroom furniture set, mattresses, and a few bags. Dave won at $300. Inside a drawer of the wicker chest Dave found a box full of unusual jewelry.
At appraisal the first few jewelry pieces – plastic.
That was so not what Dave wanted to hear. He did however have about $2,000 worth of ivory necklaces.
He also had rhino horn jewelry. Dave made bank on animal horns.
Oh, how your mind races to find that perfect pun…
Profit Scorecard:
Dave Hester: $12,100
Jarrod Schulz & Brandi Passante: $2,087
Darrell Sheets: $0
Barry Weiss: LOSS -$840
Would you have bought a hoarder’s locker?
Please leave your insightful opinions in the comment box below.